After SPM ..... is it everythings fine ??

Last time

"After SPM then study collage then work then .......bla bla bla " That's what will I say if someone ask me what will I do after SPM .

During SPM

"I wanna study harder to get better result , then I can go study Marketing at UTAR there " I will answer this if someone ask me about my future .

After SPM

"Haiz ~~ see how about my result first lo , also don't know got 5 credits or not =( " I will begin to give a reason to escape the question when someone ask me about my future .

After SPM result release and I'm qualified to study at UTAR

I really confused about my future , not because of what course I want to study , but where should I study . There are all the collage that I'm interested in .

1st = UTAR

This is the University that I wanna study at since I was form 5 ( maybe not that early la ) , its have to study a year of foundation then three years of degree program . Erm ... The fees is quite cheap , foundation is around 7k and degree program is about 33k . The degree program's fee can get the loan from PTPTN , PTPTN can give a maximum 16k per year for the loan ( but it's based on the family's income of the student ) . But .... I have to go to Kampar , Perak . If I really study UTAR , I have to split with my lovely gf for 3 years lo , I don't want to split with her even just a moment , I wish that I could stick with her if I can . Hahaha !!

Beside that , my family will have to spend a lot of money as my living cost in Kampar , Perak . I really don't want they become so "san fu" lo , I don't want to give them trouble of money just because of my problems .

So , I Think I'm not going to study there .

2nd = KDU

I will choose this collage is because my gf told me she will go to KDU study also , some more it's so near from my house . But the fees is really really too expensive for me , 70k to get the degree cert lo . So I decided to choose another collage to continue study .

Final = TARC

This collage actually is a bit far from my house lo , luckily can go by LRT . I will study at TARC is because I have no other choice anymore , and Jit Pian , Eng Keat and Hoe Chong also going to study there . TARC can also provided a 3 months training in UK for all those person who graduate from Advance Diploma , but it's have to pay 30k ( not include living cost , except hostel fee ) The environment of TARC is really not bad lo , got gym , swimming pool , football field ....... bla bla bla . I feel that if I really study there is wasn't a bad idea lo , because all those students who studying there not like all rich people , majority of them is come from a normal family .

Most probably will study there =)

Just like what my gf said " 2010 really a bad years for us lo , have a lot of important decision to make =( . Why Malaysia don't just have 1 collage leh ?? Because really hate to choose lo , it's make me confused lo !! Heard some of my friends said that still confusing now , they don't know whether should them change school now .

Year 2010 ,

This year I make my gf cried a lot , feel so guilty now =( Lao po , I knew you still feeling so blur about your collage , I really shouldn't keep on ask you about that de . Sorry =) Lao po , I'll treat you the best I could , I will study harder if we really have to study separately , won't " yai yai " . I swear !!

There's a lot of problem here

Having a really weird feeling recently .

Stress !! Moody !! Lonely !!

There's a lot of problems with me now , seems like luck is not on my side .
I'm afraid , afraid in everything .

First

I'm afraid that "she" can't study at UTAR ,
I'll worry in everything if she study at KDU alone .

Worry that we'll not that close if I study at Kampar ' Perak
Worry other guys will court her
Worry of her safety if she drive to school alone
Worry she can't understand what lecture taught her
Worry that she will be alone

Lao po , I really hope your mom will let you study at UTAR , here are the reason why

1. Jia Qi , Krystal and Shi Wei study there too
2. KDU's fee is about 30k more expensive than UTAR
3. You will study together with them in foundation
4. You can share a room with them if you go to study at Kampar's campus
5. You can be more concentrate on your study at the country place like Kampar , Perak

Second

I'm worry about the money now

If I really study at UTAR , I have to pay for foundation's fee
Its about 7k

Loan from PTPTN ??
Its only can apply for degree's program
Means ...
I've to pay by my own

But ,

My family is not rich ,
don't know parents got extra money to spend on it or not

How ??

Ask my aunt sponsor me ??
Borrow from them ??

I'm confusing !!

Third

My personality

Realized that I'm a weird person i ,
I got a lot of bad stuff , for example ;

1. Always be late and need people wait so long everytimes go out
2. No mercy to all the bad luck's people
3. Not enough responsibility while doing something
4. Not gentlemen at all
5. Lazy

*still got many more*

One more thing ,
Do you all really wanna to go Penang on next month ??
If all of you really want , then I've to plan about that .

~ That's all ~

What a bad news =( Have to study at UTAR

Its really a very bad news , I can't study at KDU with my lao po anymore , I have to study at UTAR . Actually I really wanna to study at KDU want , but based on my financial problem , I really can't afford to study there . Today I went to KDU and really ready to register already want , but then I didn't make it after the officer told me about the fee , I really realize that I can't afford that . The diploma program is about 33k for 2yrs and 4months ; then degree program is about 37k for 2yrs somethings . PTPTN can only let you loan for either diploma or degree program only , and its can't like get a full loan somemore , I have to pay some of that and my family really can't afford that .

After that I went to UTAR also to get some information about the fee all those . If I study at UTAR then I have to take 1 year foundation first , then after that go to Kampar , Perak to continue my degree . The fee of foundation is about 7k and can't loan from PTPTN , then 3 years of degree is about 33k and it can loan from PTPTN . The maximum loan can get from PTPTN is 16k yearly , but its depend on family's income . About the first year's fee , parents said they still can help me , they told me not to worry about that . They told me if I really going to continue study then must study damn hard to make sure the PTPTN won't suspend my loan .

Actually go to UTAR is a confirmed decision and I don't think it will change , but I really feel so upset with that . Not because of my result or about the money , its about my gf . She told me her mom not allowed her to study at UTAR , so she might study at KDU . Honestly I really wish that I could study at KDU together with her , but I can't . 3 years is like quite long time for me , just like what she wrote in her blog " love can be change by time , environment and people surrounding " . I doesn't mean that I'm not believe in her or I'll fall in love with another girls , but it will really cause us not that close if we're not see each other often , I'm really afraid to lose a such best future wife like her , I'm really worry !!

Now I just hope that her mom will allow her to study at UTAR . Lao po , tell her that Krystal , Shi Wei , Jia Qi and me were going to UTAR and all of us also going to Kampar , Perak . If your mom not allow you to study there just because of me , then its really worthless . Compare to UTAR , KDU is 30k more exp than UTAR and both of that is actually for the same level of certificate - degree . If your mom thought you can't study hard if we're in the same collage , then just ask her give you a try to study at UTAR for foundation first , if really not good then only study at another collage lo . If your mom is worry that you will stay with me and we will make " mistake " , I can swear to her I won't . You can ask her bring you to check monthly to see weather we got do anything that are "too much" . I can't study KDU is because of the problem of money , but you're different , you can choose . I really wish your mom can really let you decide you path by your own . Because I really felt that is really worthless to pay 30k more to study at KDU just because of me or the location lo .

I've decided to study st KDU

Maybe all of you will like " walao , Boh Ying study where then you just follow , no future la you " , or maybe some will say " don't just force yourself to study in private collage that you can't afford the fees " . But I've really decided to study at KDU with her .

I don't want to hide anyone of you , she were the main reason that I wanna study in KDU , because I wanna stick with her , I wanna see her pretty face everyday and I really wanna study hard together with her . But .... It's still some reason make me have this decision , it's about money .
Some of you might say " no money then study at UTAR la , why choose the private collage which need about 50k to study ?? " They will say " UTAR only about 30k la , why don't go there ?? " But they will never think about " how I keep my life if I study at Kampar , Perak ? " I bet if I tell then like that they will say something like " aiyo , ask your parents give money to you lo , or work part time lo . "

Haiz ~~~ I don't think they will say something like that if they knew about my family's finance . My family's income is about 4k monthly ( daddy and mommy added together ) , and they got a lot to pay like phone's fee , electric fee and all those other's thing like house payment , car payment and also food bla bla bla la . I just don't want them to get extra money for my living cost if i study at Kampar , Perak . I started to work since I was form 4 , the reason I'm working is because I wanna spend myself , I don't wanna ask money from parents anymore .

About the study fee is really not a big deal to me , because I'm gonna to get a PTPTN no matter where I'm study at . If PTPTN reject my application , I'll no gonna to study anymore . Study at UTAR or KDU is actually the same in finance problem la , no ptptn then go UTAR also can't afford de la . Then why I don't want stick with my lao po leh ?? Is it ??

Actually I really wanna apologize to my pretty lao po lo , I make you cry =( lao po , I'm sorry . I will study very very hard when we study together , I want teach you to have #1 class honour graduate de , I pronise . Lao po , I'm not going anyway anymore , we won't split want . I'll prove everyone that I go there study . So you faster faster register for it la , then I can "fong sam"

I love you

16/3/2010 .. Judgement Day

Its already 4th of March , its getting closer to the day of SPM result release date ( 16th of March 2010 ) . I think almost every examiner of spm 2009 will be nervous about it ( except those who are decided not to continue their study ) To me , the result is really so important to me , its my future and everything . I knew to many people study at collage or university is just like study at secondary school , the certificate is not really a big deal to their future , they can still use LV , Prada , AX , Gucci and Fred perry etc even they can only get 2000+ for their salary . ( because their family are rich ) But to me its a totally different story , I need that certificate to change my fate . I'm not living in a rich family , I step into this social to work since I was 16 years old to earn money for myself . Actually I'm quite enjoy with those experience like go to gym after school , then workout few hours then went home prepare to work . Its make me spend my time well , didn't waste my time at all . I think I will be so busy when the SPM result released , I have to apply for collage and also a loan from PTPTN , I've decided to study at UTAR if my result allow me to do that , and I will maybe take Marketing for business or either Banking and finance ( if Banking and Finance didn't use alot account ) . I really hope that everything can going well , hope that I can study at UTAR , because its like the only chance to change my life , the only way that I can debit all the promises that I ever give to my gf . GOD BLESS ME !!!! PLZ !!!!!!